WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD
Kindergarten Teacher: To get to the other side.
Plato: For the greater good.
Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
Karl Marx: It was an historical inevitability.
Timothy Leary: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let
it take.
Captain James Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Hippocrates: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.
Johnny Rotten: Because it was stapled the punk rocker.
Johnny Carson: Because it heard that there was a man over there laying
bricks and it wanted to see for itself.
Louis Farrakhan: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken
'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.
Martin Luther King, Jr: I envision a world where all chickens will be free
to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Moses: And God came down from the Heavens and He said unto the chicken,
"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there
was much rejoicing.
Richard Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken
did NOT cross the road.
Machiavelli: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares
why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever the motive there was.
Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed
the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates: I've just release the new Chicken Office 2009, which will not
only cross roads, but will lay eggs.
Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected
in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.
Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath
the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Buddha: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
Ralph Waldo Emerson: The chicken did not cross the road ... it transcended
it.
Ernest Hemingway: To die ... in the rain.